


Remember This

by confundedgryffindor



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Beauxbatons Sirius, F/M, Hogwarts Seventh Year, M/M, Minor Injuries, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pining, Slow Burn, Triwizard Tournament, Underage Drinking, as that is a regular theme in my fics, like hold on laddies it's going slooooow, like so much pining, there will be snape bashing, you know i say canon divergence but it's a whole ass au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-08-07
Packaged: 2020-05-28 19:01:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19400407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/confundedgryffindor/pseuds/confundedgryffindor
Summary: Remus and James' final year at Hogwarts looks to be as normal as ever, with Quidditch, pranks and Lily turning James down (again). That is, until Dumbledore announces that Hogwarts will be hosting the Triwzard Tournament, and a certain student from Beauxbatons arrives at the castle...***this is on hiatus until i get my shit together***





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> SO this shit has been on my mind for fucking ever. like MONTHS, just sitting there, prodding around, it's half the reason why i write sirius as french, etc etc. and i finally, finally, after months of just not doing anything, outlined almost the entire thing and i am ready to just THROW MYSELF into this.
> 
> now, updates may be sporadic, i might take up random projects mid writing, but it's happening and it's here. 
> 
> beta read by my chaotic and platonic soulmate, siriuslywritten ( [ stonecoldhedwig ](https://stonecoldhedwig.tumblr.com/) )
> 
> enjoy!!

“Are you sure you’re okay after-,” Remus’ mum cut herself off, then lowered her voice to a whisper. “ _ The moon? _ ”

She was standing on her tiptoes, tucking one of Remus’ short curls behind his ear in vain and fussing over the new scratch across his eyebrow. Remus swatted her hand away. Her touch stung a little, but he could just pretend that he was embarrassed of being fussed over on the middle of the platform.

“I’m fine, mum,” Remus insisted, even though his voice was still hoarse and his entire body ached. He was sweating, his school uniform not really appropriate for the hot September air, and it seemed to make the aching and stinging worse.

The last moon had been three days prior, and without James there, it had been rough, and Remus came out with more wounds and bruises than usual. During the full moons at school, when James was with him, Remus would be fine the next day. But the summer were always harder. More howling, more of throwing himself against the cellar walls and scratching himself anywhere he could reach.

“Your voice is still weak,  _ cariad _ ,” Hope frowned as she brought her hand back to Remus’ face. Remus held his face out of her reach, taking a step back. “Oh, I should’ve asked your Da for one of those potions.”

Remus gave her a humourless laugh, “I’m okay, Mum. I promise.”

Hope sighed in defeat and took a step back, standing flat on her feet again. She crossed her arms, then looked up at her son, her eyes teary. Remus smiled. 

“It’s just another year at Hogwarts, innit?” he said, putting his hand on his mother's shoulder. “It’s going to be fine.”

Hope uncrossed her arms and leaped forward to give Remus a hug. Remus groaned as she grazed the bruises and scratches on his ribs, but he hugged back nonetheless. 

“Now don’t you dare get any taller this year,” she said, her tone  _ almost  _ scolding. “A mother can only knit so many sweaters, you know.”

Remus laughed, “I’ll try my best.”

He glanced up at the clock on one of the pillars on the platform. The Express would leave in ten minutes. 

Remus let go of his mum and grabbed his trunk, “I’ve got to get on the train, but I’ll write, alright?”

Hope wiped a tear from the corner of her eye, “Seven years and it doesn’t get easier,” she muttered, then waved her hand. “Go on, meet your friends. I’ll see you next summer,  _ fy lleuad _ . Have fun!”

Remus smiled and gave her one last wave before he set off to get on the train. It felt good to be on his way back, even if he just was on the platform for now. 

Remus hopped on the train and began walking towards their usual compartment in the middle, where he would, presumably, meet up with James, Lily and Peter. Perhaps Dorcas and Marlene too.

What had happened between James and Lily last term was somewhat of a mystery to Remus. First they were almost sworn enemies (at least on Lily’s side), and Lily couldn’t even look in James’ direction without rolling her eyes, and then they were all suddenly eating breakfast together, and sitting and talking civilly in the same compartment on the train ride back to London.

Remus shook his head to clear his thoughts as he entered the compartment. It was empty, so Remus guessed that the others were being fussed over by their families as well.

He threw his trunk up on the rack above the seats, his joints and muscles groaning in protest as he did, then he slumped down in one of the window seats.

Remus leaned back and let his eyes fall shut, hoping that he would be able to fall asleep before his friends barged into the compartment. He’d have to go to the Prefect meeting as well, but maybe he could sit this one out and have Lily take care of it. He was too tired.

His wishful thinking didn’t last for long though, as James barged into the compartment not even a minute later. 

Remus groaned, but opened his eyes nonetheless, just in time to see James throw his luggage up on the rack, even though he knew it was James from his scent. The earthy smell of grass and dirt, the slightly chemical smell from his shampoo. 

That was something Remus both hated and somehow enjoyed at the same time, his sense of smell. It could be overwhelming at times, when he could smell the salty tears of first years who were sitting in the common room when Remus himself was up in the dormitory. He assumed it was a side effect of his furry little problem, as James liked to call it.

“Alright there, mate?” James asked, slumping down in the seat opposite of Remus. James was also dressed in his robes already, which was odd, because he usually putting off wearing the school robes until the last minute.

“I was before you came in,” Remus muttered. James snorted and retrieved his battered snitch from his pocket.

“Did you have a nice summer?” James let the snitch out of his hand, then grabbed it mid air, almost smushing one of the wings.

“I was with you for two weeks,” Remus said. “You should know whether I had a nice summer or not.”

James shrugged, “You also spent the better part of the summer locked in the Lupin Cottage, didn’t you?”

Remus sighed, “It was fine. I played some guitar, scratched myself open in my cellar, got sunburn as my dad forced me to carry around big cement blocks. You know, the usual.”

James nodded, letting go of the snitch and grabbing it again. He ran his hand through his hair and gave an awkward laugh, “Something weird happened after you left, actually. Er…-”

James was cut off by Lily and Peter walking into the compartment. Peter was breathing heavily, and Remus had to keep himself from scrunching up his nose at the strong stink of sweat coming from his friend. 

He used the term ‘friend’ loosely with Peter though, sure, they’d slept in the same dorm for six years, and they  _ had been  _ friends. Not since fifth year though, and now they were more… acquaintances, than anything.

“Hey,” Lily said, then turned to put her trunk up on the rack. “I thought we would find you here. Peter almost had a breakdown on the platform because he didn’t know where you were.” 

Peter spluttered as James let out a laugh. Remus snorted, and couldn’t help but think that a breakdown served Peter right.

“It wasn’t a breakdown, alright?” Peter said as he shoved his trunk underneath the seats, instead of bothering with trying to get it up on the rack. He sat down close to the door, and Remus knew it was because Peter wanted to sit as far away as possible from him. “I was just… nervous.”

“Isn’t that just your regular setting?” Remus muttered. Peter laughed nervously, moving closer to the door. Remus glared at him. “Oh my god, I’m not gonna fucking eat you, Peter. Relax.”

Remus sank back into his seat, then turned to James, “You were saying something?”

“Right,” James said, holding tightly onto his snitch. “Right, so… Dumbledore made me Head Boy.”

Remus frowned at him, then looked over at Lily, who shrugged. He turned back to James, “He made  _ you _ , of all perfectly competent people, Head Boy.”

James laughed, then gestured to the badge on his robes. Remus raised his eyebrows. 

“It’s absurd,” Lily muttered. “You’re like the opposite of Head Boy material.”

“Oh shut it, Ms Head Girl Evans,” James said. Remus’ eyebrows raised even further. Not that he was surprised that Lily was Head Girl, but more about the fact that Dumbledore had paired them together. “I can enforce the rules if I want to, right, Moony?”

Remus laughed, a full-on, rib-hurting laugh, then Lily started sniggering as well. Even Peter joined in, albeit a little nervously. 

“ _ Right, Moony?”  _ James said again, glaring at Remus. Remus took a few deep breaths and wiped away a few fake tears. 

“Oh, yeah,” Remus nodded, still breathing heavily, his face flushed from his laughter. “Mh-hm, definitely. Prongs and rules, best friends forever.”

“Oh, fuck you,” James said, then he started fidgeting with his snitch again. “Be careful so I don’t throw you in detention, asshat.”

Remus just chuckled and flipped him the bird before closing his eyes and sinking back against the wall. He was tired and achy and he just wanted to sleep through the entire train ride. 

“Alright, Rem?” Lily asked and put her hand on his knee. He was  _ so  _ tired of people asking him whether he was okay or not. He was fine. Or as fine he could be three days after his body had completely rearranged itself, and he’d torn and ripped it apart, only to have it relocated and “fixed” again, all within the span of a few hours.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he muttered, then added— “Tired.”

He could imagine the looks Lily and James were sharing so clearly that it felt as though he had his eyes open. The pitiful, sad looks that said “I wish we could do something.” The looks he’d gotten far too many times, from far too many people.

“You wanna sit this Prefect meeting out?” James asked, fidgeting with his snitch. Remus let out a sigh of relief.

“That would be great. Thanks.”

“It’s no problem,” Lily said. Remus nodded slowly and wrapped his cloak tighter around himself, even though he was still sweating.

Remus woke up by loud voices and the bustling sound of trunks being torn open. He groaned and cracked an eye open, and saw Marlene, Dorcas, Peter, James and Lily all doing or talking about something. Dorcas and Marlene were struggling with getting their uniforms out, Peter was trying to close his trunk, but a ruffle of white and maroon silk fabric was hanging out, preventing him from closing the trunk properly. James and Lily were talking animatedly about something, James still fidgeting with his snitch.

The sun had set, and the compartment was lit by the yellowish light from the lamp that sat on the ceiling. It still smelled of Peter’s sweat, as well as the sweet smell from the sweets and pastries that the trolly-witch sold.

Remus sat up properly and rubbed his eyes, James turned to him and grinned. 

“He’s alive!”

A round of  _ Whoop! _ s went around the compartment. Remus scrunched up his face and groaned, then scrubbed his hands over his face. 

Peter kept struggling with his trunk, then let out a very frustrated, “Does anyone know why the  _ hell  _ we were supposed to bring dress robes?!”

Remus opened his eyes to frown at Peter, just in time to see James and Lily share a look. 

“You know something we don’t, don’t you?” Marlene asked, throwing herself down in her seat. James pressed his lips into a tight line and continued playing with his snitch, and Lily dug out a chocolate frog from her pocket as she turned to face Remus. 

“You missed the trolly, and we’re nearly there,” she said, handing the chocolate frog to Remus. “But I just assumed you wanted some chocolate.”

As if on queue, Remus’ stomach gave a loud rumble. He grabbed the frog and gave her a weak smile, “Cheers.”

He unwrapped the chocolate, handed the collector card to James without a word, then took a large bite from the frog, biting off its head.

“Ey, I got Dumbledore again,” James grinned, stuffing the card in his cloak. “I could make a shrine for him with all the cards I’ve got.”

Remus snorted, stuffing the rest of the chocolate into his mouth. It didn’t really help with his hunger. It seemed to make it worse, even. He sighed, slumping back against the wall again.

He directed his gaze out the window, squinting in the darkness lit by the half moon, only making out trees, that turned into sheep grazing the grass fields, which turned to trees again. 

He was finally on his way back  _ home.  _ Where the Wolf didn’t rumble underneath the surface no matter what day or time it was. Where the laughs weren’t short, forced out of him after half-offensive jokes his father made over dinner. (“Slow down, Remus, you’re eating like a wolf.”) Where he could sleep peacefully, where he could run around freely, commentate the Quidditch matches and throw dung bombs at Snivellus. Where no one commented on his eating habits, where he could hide at the Astronomy Tower and have a joint or two. He was finally going  _ home. _

He smiled to himself then turned to James, “Is this whole  _ Head Boy  _ thing going to make you a wet blanket?”

“Did being Prefect make you a wet blanket?” James retorted, shooting Remus a mischievous grin. He lowered his voice to a whisper, “I’ve got some great things planned.”   
Remus grinned, and he swore he could feel the stinging and aching subside a little as both the Wolf and his human mind said  _ Home. _


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dumbledore's announcment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wowie i have so many chapters planned for this i really hope that you like it. i had this chapter pre-written, but from now on i'll be writing as i post, so if updates are slow then i apologise in advance. ch3 is currently being written but who knows when it's done lmao
> 
> beta read by siriuslywritten ([ stonecoldhedwig](https://stonecoldhedwig.tumblr.com/)) which will be the case for this entire story lmao
> 
> enjoy!

“Firs’ years! Firs’ years over here!” Remus grinned at Hagrid’s booming voice, echoing over the chatter at Hogsmeade station. It felt so familiar, so  _ safe,  _ and a pang went through Remus’ chest when it dawned on him that this was the last time he would be here. This was the last time he’d try to slink through the hundreds of students in order to get to the horseless carriages, this was the last time he’d walk, arm slung over James’ shoulder on their way to class. This was the last time he’d get to Hogwarts and  _ stay there _ .

But Remus was  _ fine,  _ he decided. He was going to be fine. There was probably some cool job he could get as a werewolf. Freelance curse breaker, maybe, or a shopkeeper somewhere (which wasn’t  _ as  _ cool, but he’d have to take what he could get).

James slung his arm over Remus’ shoulder. “Let’s get the best carriage before everyone else gets there.”

Remus smiled. “Let’s go.”

They snaked their way through the students, and Remus’ chest ached again.  _ He was fine.  _ They almost bumped into a bunch of confused second years, who then ended up following him and James to the carriages. 

They got inside an empty carriage and took seats opposite of each other, James slumping down far more than necessary in his seat. Remus rolled his eyes, but he was grinning. He hoped that he and James would stay in touch after Hogwarts; his life would be miserable without him. 

They’d done so much together, James and Remus, and Peter too, before the  _ incident.  _ An unstoppable force, an inseparable group. Remus didn’t want to lose that. He could lose the security of Hogwarts, he could live in squalor or under a bridge, but he didn’t want to lose James. Not after he’d done so much for Remus, making sure that he had company during and after every Full, giving him presents despite Remus’ protests, being a  _ friend.  _

The door to the carriage opened, pulling Remus out of his thoughts, and Lily and Peter stepped inside. Lily smiled, taking the seat next to Remus. Peter remained frozen in the opening, eyeing Remus up and down before sinking down in the seat closest to the door. Remus rolled his eyes, letting out an exaggerated sigh before staring out of the window. James immediately started a conversation, seemingly never running out of new topics to talk about. Remus was sure he was talking about new Quidditch techniques, but he tuned it out and just stared into the little part of Hogsmeade village he could see.

The carriage jerked to a start and started rolling along on the gravelled path towards the school. Remus sat silent, watching as the grounds and the castle rolled into sight. He was both happy and sad at the same time, excited about coming home but sad that it would be the last time. 

He decided that he was going to make the most of it. He didn’t have much time, and he would do everything to make it count before he was released into the  _ real  _ world, where a war was brimming right underneath the surface, where he would most likely have to live isolated and alone. He had to make it better somehow, make more memories of Hogwarts, broaden his options of what to do when he got out. He knew that he wouldn’t be able to enjoy his time at Hogwarts if he was dreading his leave. So, despite everything, he had to be a little optimistic.

“—Right Moony?” James said, pulling Remus out of his thoughts yet again. 

“Huh?”

“We’re going to do some great prank this year, leave a mark on the school. Start a legacy.”

Remus snorted. It sounded stupid, to start a  _ legacy  _ at a goddamn school, but it made him feel better about this whole ordeal. To leave a mark, to be remembered. 

“Of course,” Remus grinned. “We shall be remembered until the downfall of Hogwarts.”

Lily rolled her eyes, but she was smiling too. She rose to her feet and clambered out of the carriage. “Come on, you dramatic bastards. I’m starving.”

The Great Hall looked as magical as always, with the floating candles and enchanted ceiling. Remus smiled, giving the head table an extra long look before he sank down at the Gryffindor table. 

A low hum of chatter settled over the hall, and Remus wasn’t even bothered. Often, the sound got too much, too intense, but now it just felt good. Familiar. 

The Sorting Hat sang its new, awfully-wretched song before they moved onto the actual sorting, which seemed to take forever. But this time Remus wasn’t even mad about it. His stomach was growling aggressively, it was slow and excruciating, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. He and James had made it their mission to clap the loudest for every Gryffindor, earning them several dirty looks from the other tables. James even stood up on the bench as he cheered and hooted at every “GRYFFINDOR!” that rang out throughout the hall.

Once the last person had been sorted — a terrified looking girl who’d trudged over to the Ravenclaw table, eyes wide and unfocused — Dumbledore rose to his feet. Remus groaned. He really,  _ really  _ just wanted to eat. He even considered trying out cannibalism for a brief second and just swallow Dumbledore whole, horrid robes and long beard and all. He quickly pushed that thought away as Dumbledore said, “Enjoy the feast!” in his booming voice before sitting down again.

Remus was the second person at Gryffindor table to immediately reach after one of the large plates of food (first was Peter, of course), and he piled on far more food than he should have. But he was  _ so  _ hungry, and the Wolf was  _ impossible  _ to satisfy. He didn’t seem to gain any weight either, which both Remus and his mum thought was infuriating. He got taller, got the occasional weak muscle, but other than that he always remained the same, lanky beanpole. 

Remus could see Lily, Marlene and Dorcas frown at his mountain of food. He quirked a brow at them as if to say “Don’t think I can finish it?” and started cutting up his monstrosity of a plate with his fork. The more he could fit into his mouth in one go the better.

“Merlin, Moons,” James said as Remus shovelled a fork-full of roast potatoes and chicken mush into his mouth. “Did your parents starve you?”

“‘s the Wolf,” Remus replied around his mouthful of food. He swallowed it down and continued in a hushed voice, “You of all people should know how hungry I get after the Full, and we don’t have a lot of money. The welcoming feast it the best thing to ever happen to me.”

James threw his head back and laughed, then quickly composed himself and started tucking into his own meal. 

Remus was too busy eating to really contribute to conversations around, but he gave the occasional hum or nod when he felt like it fitted. The conversations jumped between all kinds of topics; the war and how at least ten muggles had “mysteriously died” during the summer, the upcoming NEWTs, even more Quidditch talk (James and Marlene talked the most about that). 

“We need a new beater,” James said as the dinner plates cleared and pudding appeared in its place. “Now that Westley is gone, we need someone to take his place,” he grabbed a few chocolate eclairs and put them on his plate. “‘s a shame, really. Westley was good.”

Remus hummed, gulping down a goblet of pumpkin juice. He liked Quidditch. Shit in the air on a broom, but good enough as a commentator. It was fun, in some strange way, to watch  _ others  _ have fun.

“Not as good as me,” Marlene smirked over her goblet. “I’m a fantastic beater.”

“There’s a reason why you’ve been on the team since third year,” James said.

“Damn right.”

The topic bounced again, and suddenly they were talking about the next Common Room party in hushed voices. Remus saw James and Lily share another look, Lily looking wary and James looking smug. Lily chewed her lip, took a deep breath and shook her head. James grinned, and the conversation flowed again.

“Do we even have a record player this year?” Remus asked. 

Lily nodded, “I brought mine, now that Frank is gone.”

“Gone?!” Peter squeaked. “What happened to him?”

Remus frowned at Peter, “He graduated last term.”

“Oh,” Peter ducked his head, suddenly very red and flustered. Remus stared at Peter for a moment before shaking his head and going back to his pudding. It was astounding just how  _ thick  _ Peter could be at times, but he was used to it, he supposed.

Before everything went downhill, so to speak, Remus wasn’t bothered by Peter’s blatant stupidity, because he was a good friend. He was good at other things, and he did have a knack for Charms and Care of Magical Creatures, but after fifth year and the  _ incident  _ that had happened, Remus found himself getting irritated at Peter for basically nothing. He could breathe slightly too loudly, and Remus would shoot a silencing charm at him. It was Peter’s fault, though. Remus hadn’t been the one running around telling people he was a werewolf. Peter had done that. (Though he’d only told one person, Snape, which was objectively worse in every single way.) It wasn’t some sort of mystery as to why Remus disliked Peter, it was obvious, and maybe he should tone it down a little with the snapping and hexing, but he really couldn’t help it. Even though Remus only saw a former best friend or an acquaintance, the Wolf saw a traitor. A  _ rat.  _ And no matter how hard Remus tried, he couldn’t always silence the Wolf.

The plates cleared yet again, and Remus looked up towards the High Table just in time to see Dumbledore rising to his feet. 

Dumbledore cleared his throat, and the Hall fell silent at once. “So! Now that we’re all fed and watered, I must once more ask for your attention, while I give out a few notices,” Dumbledore said, smiling faintly through his beard. “Firstly, our caretaker Filch would like to ask you keep charms and other spellwork out of the corridors after and between classes.” His eyes went over to Remus and James, who just grinned at each other.

“I would also like to remind you all that the Forest in the grounds is out of bounds, as is the village Hogsmeade to all below third year,” Dumbledore continued, addressing the whole school again. He took a deep breath, and his smile faltered for a brief second. “It is also my painful duty to inform you all that the inter-house Quidditch Cup will not take place this year.”

“WHAT?!” James shouted, rising to his feet. “You can’t cancel Quidditch!”

Remus grabbed ahold of James’ robes, forcing him to sit down again. James glared at Dumbledore, then reluctantly sat back down.

“I certainly can, Mr. Potter,” Dumbledore smiled. “But I assure you that it is for good reason. This Is due to an event that will be starting in October, and continuing throughout the school year, taking up much of the teachers’ time and energy — but I am sure you will all enjoy it immensely,” he paused for a second, probably enjoying the slight tension in the hall that started building with every second. “I have great pleasure in announcing that this year at Hogwarts, we have the honour of hosting a very exciting event over the following months, an event which has not been held in over a century. It is my very great pleasure to inform you that the Triwizard Tournament will be taking place at Hogwarts this year.”

The hall erupted in shouts and cheers from every table, people whistled and clapped their hands, but not Remus. He felt his heart fall down to the pit of his stomach, and suddenly he couldn’t really breathe and the noise got too much and—

“The Triwizard Tournament!” Dumbledore said loudly, silencing the school again. He kept talking and Remus could see his lips moving, but he couldn’t hear anything. His ears were ringing and he couldn’t breathe. 

This year was his last year, he was supposed to  _ do something.  _ Great pranks, help James win the Quidditch Cup, pass his NEWTs and have a  _ normal year.  _ His last year wasn’t supposed to be about a Tournament and other schools. This was supposed to be enjoyable and easy, not involve a possible death toll or new people to interfere with his school year.

Remus wanted to get up and leave, he wanted to run up to the Astronomy Tower and have a cigarette, he wanted to listen to Queen with James and plan something. He didn’t want this to happen. But he remained frozen in his seat, trying to listen to Dumbledore speak over the ringing in his ears.

Remus couldn’t really breathe until he heard Dumbledore say, “Bedtime!” and everyone in the hall rose to their feet. 

Remus was out of the Great Hall before he could register that he’d even gotten out of his seat, and he took as large steps as possible as he made his way up the dormitory, trying to avoid bumping into anyone. 

He rushed past Peeves, who started his taunting “Loony Loopy Lupin,” verse when he saw Remus. 

Remus stopped in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady, ready to say the password when he realized that he didn’t actually know what the password was.

“Password?” The Fat Lady asked, examining her nails. Remus sighed, holding in the urge to stomp his foot.

“I don’t know.”

“That’s incorrect.”

“I don’t know the password,” Remus said, exasperated.

“Hmm… Pity.”

Remus groaned. He wanted to get up to the dorm, curl up in his bed and read some stupid book. He stomped his foot, he didn’t care how childish or stupid he looked. The sound of his foot hitting the stone floor echoed throughout the corridor, followed by even more steps. Remus frowned and turned around, then groaned again. James was walking towards him, his eyebrows knitted together. 

“There you are!” James slapped his hand down on Remus’ shoulder. “Why did you run off like that?”

“Headache,” Remus mumbled. 

“Why are you just standing here and pouting then?”

“I don’t have the password.”

“Oh! I forgot to tell you,” James gave his shoulder another unnecessary slap before turning to the Fat Lady. “Tesserae.”

Remus didn’t spare a second glance at James as the portrait swung open. He just went inside the common room, then rushed up the stairs to their dormitory.  
This was supposed to his last year, his last time at Hogwarts, and he was supposed to make the most of it, but the stupid _ fucking _ Tournament ruined it, and he couldn’t stand it. He wanted a normal, fun year, not the stress of one of the students possibly dying, not extra students from other schools. He wanted  _ normal.  _ (Or, as normal as Hogwarts would be.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave a comment of what you think and yell at me on my tumblr, [ confunded-gryffindor](https://confunded-gryffindor.tumblr.com/)


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James does his best with juggling his new Head Boy duties, helping his self-repressing friend and ignoring his crush on a certain Lily Evans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was An Bitch :tm: to write, and if you follow me on tumblr, you know why lolzor.  
> long story short, i had writers block because i was too stressed to think properly.  
> also this chapter is literally 12 pages long (just about 5.3k words) which is also why it took forever. 
> 
> huge thank you to kt ([stonecoldhedwig](https://stonecoldhedwig.tumblr.com/) / [siriuslywritten](https://archiveofourown.org/users/siriuslywritten)) for being a fantastic beta and helping me infinetly with getting this chapter out there.
> 
> warnings for minor injuries and stupid pureblood mania.

People often said that James was as unobservant as a brick wall, which was, to a certain extent, fairly true. He knew how to read his friends’ moods, so he wasn’t  _ completely  _ clueless, but he did…  _ struggle _ with picking up certain things. But now, as he walked through the castle on his way to breakfast the day after the welcoming feast, he could feel how tense the energy was. He heard the whispers around him, both excited and scared. People who wondered why the  _ hell  _ Dumbledore had decided that it was a good idea to host a  _ deadly tournament,  _ people who boasted about wanting to put their name in immediately and how they’d  _ surely be picked  _ and how they’d  _ definitely win. _

He’d noticed that Remus wasn’t happy about this whole Triwizard ordeal, and he had been more snappy than necessary towards everyone last night. He even went so far as to cast an  _ Incendio  _ on Peter’s wispy moustache, and while James knew how to calm them down in the moment, he didn’t know how to talk to him about it. He didn't know how to ask and to prod until Remus bore his soul to him; that wasn't really his territory, was it? So, he resolved to ignore it as best he could, and to carry on as if nothing had happened. They’d all talked about the Triwizard Tournament last night, briefly at least. James had said that he was planning on putting his name in the Tournament, and then Peter’s moustache had gone up in flames. He hadn’t said that it would help him with making a name for himself, because it wouldn’t put a name on him and Remus.  _ The Marauders.  _

James sighed as he turned a corner on his way to the Great Hall. The Marauders weren’t really a  _ thing  _ anymore, and it hurt a little. Peter’s name had been scratched over on their map by Remus, who’d been so angry and disappointed that Dumbledore had arranged for Peter to sleep in a different dorm for a week until Remus cooled down. They weren’t Wormtail, Moony and Prongs anymore, they were Moony and Prongs and Peter, and even though it hurt, James often found himself thinking that he really didn’t miss having Peter around at all times that much anymore. They were still friendly, they could still talk, but it didn’t feel like they could trust him, like he was the friend they thought he was. 

James swallowed hard before he went inside the Great Hall, then plastered a smile on his face as he went up to the Gryffindor table. He slumped down in his usual seat smack in the middle of the table, and reached for one of the teapots. He pushed his cup closer to himself and poured up the amber liquid, savouring the sweet smell.

He sat in silence, jiggling his leg and waiting for Remus. The chatter in the hall helped with drowning out some of his thoughts; Lily, the Tournament, his grades, what to do when he graduated,  _ if  _ he could do anything when he graduated, Peter. James sighed again and took a sip from his tea, deciding not to think about the future and only think about today.

He grabbed a piece of toast just as Remus slumped down in front of him, his face set in a glare. 

“Morning,” James said, slathering jam onto his toast. Remus grunted and grabbed a coffee pot. “How are we today?”

“I wish I was dead,” Remus muttered. He almost filled his cup to the brim, then grabbed the sugar pot in front of him. James snorted. “Honestly. Who the fuck decided that it was a good idea to start lessons the day after we arrive?” Remus piled a few sausages onto his plate, still glaring. James snorted again.

“I dunno,” he shrugged. 

“It’s fucking stupid.” Remus piled on a few bacon pieces onto his plate as well, then grabbed his fork.

“One would think you’d get used to it after almost seven years.”

Remus huffed and stabbed a sausage onto his fork, then took a bite from it without cutting it up. James watched as his friend ate, unsure of what to say. He agreed with Remus; it was, indeed,  _ fucking stupid  _ to have classes on their first day back, but they had other issues at hand to talk about. Like why Remus had set Peter’s moustache on fire when he  _ hadn’t even been talking.  _ And why he was still being grumpy even after he’d chugged down his cup of coffee.

James took a deep breath. “So, wanna tell me why you set fire to Peter’s moustache last night?”

Remus shrugged. “It was fun.”

“He almost cried!”

“Exactly.”

“Remus,” James said. Not  _ Moony.  _ Setting fire to your former best mate’s moustache didn’t call for affectionate nicknames. It was serious business, because even though they weren’t friends anymore, they had all agreed on being  _ friendly _ , and while Peter’s wispy moustache was ugly, it wasn’t the best approach to burn it off for no other reason than spite. They had grown past that. “Talk to me.”

Remus sighed. “I’m just… stressed. I’ll apologise to him later.”

“Why are you stressed? Is it the Tournament? Or—“ he cut himself off, lowering his voice a little even though the chatter in the hall drowned him out. —“the moon?” 

Remus rolled his eyes. “It’s nothing,” he said. “But it was wrong of me to burn off those two hairs, and I’ll apologise later.”

James sighed. Of course it was ‘nothing’ in Remus’ head, even though it probably was everything. Something big, pricking and nagging Remus until he exploded. They’d been friends long enough for James to know that Remus could go forever without saying anything about what was troubling him, and then it would slowly seep out around the edges until he finally tipped over, like a goblet overfilling, and he would scratch himself up in the Shrieking Shack, howl until he couldn’t talk the next day and  _ then _ he’d talk to James about it. It had happened far too many times and James didn’t want it to be like that again, but he nodded anyways. He could prod and poke later. 

“Whatever,” James muttered and shoved the rest of his toast into his mouth, then added, “You’re impossible, you know that, right?” It came out muffled and a little choked through his mouthful of toast, but Remus must’ve heard because he flipped James the bird before returning to his mountain of bacon and sausages. 

“Who’s impossible?” James turned around at the voice beside him, and saw Marlene and Dorcas seating themselves at the table, Marlene next to James and Dorcas next to Remus.

“Remus,” James said. He gulped down some tea and reached for another piece of toast, then slathered that in jam as well. 

“You’re going to get cavities from eating all that,” Dorcas said, nodding to the toast in James’ hand, that was now more jam than bread. 

“It’s fine,” James said. “I brush my teeth.”

“Barely,” Remus huffed. James kicked his leg under the table. “Oi!” Remus glared at him, and James glared right back.

“Don’t expose me.”

Marlene snorted and reached for a coffee pot, pouring herself half a cup which she then filled out with sugar and cream. Dorcas’ eyes widened as her girlfriend spooned several teaspoons of sugar into her coffee. 

“Your teeth are going to rot too! Merlin!”

“It’s fine,” Marlene said, repeating James’ words, then took a sip. Remus stared at her coffee, looking mildly disgusted. 

“I have a sweet tooth, but that is too much, McKinnon.”

“Well excuse me for not liking my coffee black like you heathens,” Marlene said defensively. James laughed and slung his arm over her shoulders. 

“We’ll start a club, Marls,” he grinned. “ _ Hogwarts students for sweet breakfasts _ .” He waved his free hand in front of them, as if trying to envision the banner in front of him. Marlene snorted again and shrugged his arm off. 

“Get off me, Potter. I don’t have time for your antics.”

“Oh yeah? And what are you doing during your free time, then?” 

Marlene sniffed, taking a sip from her cream with coffee. “Important stuff.”

Remus let out a short chuckle. “Yeah, like snogging your girlfriend in every free broom cupboard you can find.”

“As I said,” Marlene said, shooting a glare towards Remus. “I do important stuff.”

Both James and Remus threw their heads back and laughed as Dorcas flushed red and kicked Marlene’s leg. Marlene winked at Dorcas over her coffee cup, earning her another kick. 

“I see you lot are settling in well as usual.” The group fell silent at the voice of Professor Mcgonagall, right behind James, who turned around to face his Professor. 

“Doesn’t take long to settle in here, Minnie,” James grinned. Professor Mcgonagall hummed, handing timetables to the group.

“Remember that you are supposed to be a role model this year, Potter,” their Professor said. James grinned.

“Are you doubting my abilities to remain professional and mature for the younger students?” he asked. Professor McGonagall only lifted one eyebrow, staring directly at James as she tapped her wand on their timetables, making their schedule for their lessons to appear on the previously blank parchment, then she kept walking down the table to hand out the schedules to the remaining students. Remus threw his head back and laughed as James frowned after their Professor. “She’s doubting me.”

“No fucking shit.” Remus laughed even harder at James’ crestfallen face, almost howling. Dorcas and Marlene laughed too, and McGonagall turned back to them. 

“Behave this year, Mr. Potter,” she said, then turned to Remus. “You too, Mr. Lupin.”

Remus stopped laughing and cleared his throat a couple of times before nodding seriously. “Of course, Professor.” 

She gave them each a tight but sincere smile, then walked up to the Head Table again. James frowned after her. 

“I can’t believe her. Can you believe her? They make me Head Boy and then just immediately starts doubting me. Unbelievable.” 

Marlene opened her mouth to say something, but was interrupted by hundreds of owls flying into the Hall, letters and packages held tightly in their beaks. James didn’t know if he was happy or slightly irritated with the interruption until he saw his own owl, Amory, heading down to their table, a letter and  _ The Daily Prophet  _ in his beak. James smiled as Amory dropped the latter and paper in front of him, and them perched himself on James’ shoulder. James grabbed the letter first, knowing fully well that he’d only read the headlines of  _ The Daily Prophet, _ then he’d get angry or confused at some stupid remarks or a report of dead muggles and just shove the paper in his bag to read the sports segment and do the crossword after classes. 

The letter was from his parents; they always sent one every morning after he arrived at Hogwarts, always telling him how empty the house felt without him accidentally crushing a lamp, how much they missed him and how they couldn’t wait until the winter holidays for him to come back home. Euphemia used to send biscuits as well, but she’d stopped doing that in third year when she got word that only Remus and Peter ate them, so she started sending the biscuits directly to them instead. She still sent biscuits to Remus after every Full and during breakfast after the Welcoming Feast, and Remus’ face always lit up the same way.

James unfolded the letter in his hand, skimming over the usual words of  _ We miss you  _ and  _ Don’t forget to write,  _ then he stopped at the end and read the same words over and over, like he always did.  _ We love you,  _ written in Hindi. It was really the best thing in those letters, because he’d read the  _ We miss you _ ’s and  _ Don’t forget to write _ ’s so many times that the words almost lost their meaning, but  _ We love you,  _ written in their native language was  _ their  _ thing, and it never got old. It always warmed him up, always reminded him that he was loved, if he ever doubted it, and he loved it. 

James smiled at the letter before stuffing it into his pocket, then turned to the  _ Prophet  _ to read the headlines. 

_ Muggle attack in central London. See page 1-2 _

_ Dementor attack in Cardiff, Wales. See page 3. _

_ Hogwarts is hosting The Triwizard Tournament this year, parents fear for their children’s safety. Read more on page 5. _

_ The Daily Crossword. See page 11. _

James sighed and rolled the paper up before unmercifully shoving it into his bag, then turned his attention to the timetable. He had Care of Magical Creatures first thing, which would be fun, then Charms, double Potions and lastly Transfiguration. He peered over the table, trying to read Remus’ timetable as well, but he couldn’t see anything, even with his glasses. He pouted and turned to his owl instead. He gave Amory a piece of toast and watched him fly again, and almost wished that he could fly away with him.

“Oi Moony, what’s your first class?”

“Care of Magical Creatures.” James grinned.

“You done shoving sausages into your face then? We can walk down together.”

Remus nodded and grabbed one last piece of bacon before grabbing his bag and standing up. 

“Where are you going?” Marlene asked. She was still sipping her cream with coffee. 

“Class,” Remus said shortly, then he rushed out of the hall. James rolled his eyes and turned to Marlene. 

“Care of Magical Creatures.” Marlene booed after he’d said it, and James snorted before he left as well, shouting a “See you later!” over his shoulder. 

He found Remus at the entrance to the castle, looking extremely concentrated as he fumbled in his bag for something. James took a few large steps towards him, then punched him on the shoulder. “Why do you keep running off like that?”

“Like what?” Remus said absent-mindedly, retrieving a packet of cigarettes from his bag. He took one out and put it between his lips before he started walking. 

“Like you’re about to shit yourself if you stay with people for longer than ten minutes.” Remus laughed and shook his head, then he lit his cigarette. 

“I do kinda feel like that,” he said, smoke tumbling out of his lips as he spoke. “But it’s nothing, I just needed a smoke.”

“Fucking hell, you’re impossible.” James stuck his fingers under his glasses to rub his eyes, then looked at Remus again. “You were supposed to quit this summer.” He nodded to the cigarette between his fingers. Remus took a drag from the cigarette, then blew out the smoke right in James’ face. James spluttered and punched his shoulder again, murmuring “Dick” under his breath. Remus laughed again.

“I would’ve, but my mum hands me a smoke every other hour.”

“Your mum?” James’ eyebrows rose. That seemed very irresponsible, but maybe it was fairly normal. His own parents treated him like he was Merlin himself, walking among them, and he needed to be treated like fragile glass, and in turn they also treated his friends like that. Every time Remus groaned at his aching bones or had a scab on his arm, James’ mum was there in a second, bandaging and shoving potions down Remus’ throat, as if she had a sixth sense that told her to take care of someone. She was very against smoking though, and had threatened Remus to take away the biscuits if he didn’t quit his  _ nasty habit,  _ which evidently only had worked for a total of two days.

“Yeah.” Remus shrugged, taking another drag from his cigarette. “She smokes more than I do.”

James just shrugged, and they continued walking to class in silence. They walked the same route they had been walking down for the past seven years; out the main entrance, past the ugly statue that was supposed to resemble Circe, into the courtyard where someone always sat, hoping they would be able to skip class by hiding in plain sight. Out one of the excessively large columns by the even larger oak tree (the one where couples carved in their initials with their quills, thinking that it would last forever if they did it. It never did), reroute past the greenhouses to give Remus more time to finish his cigarettes, down the worn down path in the impossibly green grass, past Hagrid’s hut and finally down to the clearing where Professor Kettleburn held his lessons.

It wasn’t a classroom, of course it wasn’t, it was a clearing just at the edge of the Forbidden Forest that held paddocks for the larger animals and the rumoured thestrals, as well as a few cages to whatever animal Kettleburn had deemed non-threatening enough to show a class of twenty people. James liked to think that it was a classroom though, with the large trees and the small bushes surrounding them. It gave a free vibe, no walls closing them in, no stern glares and wobbly desks with ink stains. It gave the same feel as Quidditch practice — wind tousling their hair, cold air nipping their hands, sun glaring down, burning their faces. James felt free there, and he loved it.

He and Remus were the first to arrive at the clearing, save for Professor Kettleburn, who was crouching by a large cage, covered in a large cloth. He was cooing and mumbling into the cage, tapping his fingers lightly on the cloth. James covered a laugh by an unconvincing cough, and theProfessor looked up at him and Remus. Remus quickly flicked his cigarette butt into the forest, then gave a small wave. 

“Morning, Professor,” James said. He waved as well, and Professor Kettleburn rose to his full height. He was as bandaged and scratched up as always, wobbling slightly on his metal peg leg. James was almost amazed at how long Dumbledore had let him stay, considering his lack of limbs and left eye, but he was a good teacher, so perhaps it wasn’t  _ insane  _ that he was still there.

“Good morning, Potter. Lupin.” He nodded in their direction, then tapped on the cage again, with his claw hand this time. A low growl came from the cage, followed by a slightly louder hiss. James frowned at the cage, then looked over at Remus, who just shrugged at James’ questioning look. 

“What’ve you got in there, Professor?” James asked, running a hand through his hair. “Sounds like a lion.” 

“Or a snake,” Remus said. 

“Ah, we’ll save that for the class, I think.” Kettleburn scratched his patchy beard with his claw hand. “Wouldn’t be fair to show you before the rest are here, would it?”

James only hummed, then sunk down on the ground in front of a tree. Remus leaned against the tree and crossed his arms, looking out over the forest. His face was pensive; he was probably thinking about the next moon, even though it was a while until then. 

The rest of the students seemed to drop in one by one; it wasn’t a big class anyways. Three Gryffindors - James, Remus and Mary - and four Ravenclaws whose names James hadn’t bothered with memorising. Soon, they were all gathered in the little clearing, James and Remus still seated by the tree, and Mary stood with the Ravenclaws, trying to make conversation with some skinny looking bloke who looked like he couldn’t care less about Mary’s eyeshadow. 

“Good morning!” Professor Kettleburn exclaimed. He looked as though he was going to clasp his hands together, but changed his mind before he could scratch up his only functioning hand with his claw. “Er… Right, right! Gather ‘round, gather ‘round. We have a special creature to discuss these following weeks.” He smiled widely and gave the cage behind him a light pat, whereafter it emitted another hiss.

James hauled himself to his feet and walked closer to the professor, along with the rest of the class. 

“What is it, then?” asked one of the Ravenclaws. 

Professor Kettleburn grinned proudly and grabbed ahold of the cloth covering the cage. “This,” he said, ripping the cloth off with a flourish, “is-”

“A FUCKING CHIMAERA!” Remus exclaimed, backing away. His eyes were wide, his face suddenly fearful. James laughed loudly and clutched at his stomach, as he practically howled at his friend’s reaction. 

“Language, Mr. Lupin,” Professor Kettleburn said in a sing-song voice. He cleared his throat, then carefully tapped the cage again. “But yes, it is a chimaera.”

The chimaera looked terrifying, and James understood why Remus had reacted the way he did. It was large, with the body and head of a lion. It had a goat’s head - _another head_ \- sticking up from its back, and the tail was _a_ _goddamn snake_. Not an actual tail. A snake _in lieu_ of a tail. It looked unreal, but then again, when did an animal in Care of Magical Creatures _did_ look ordinary? They had studied hippogriffs and sphinxes after all, so a chimaera wasn’t entirely out of the ordinary.

Professor Kettleburn made a move to clasp his hands together again, then sighed loudly and put them behind his back instead, and began pacing in front of the cage. “Now, can anyone tell me what a chimaera is?” he asked. One of the Ravenclaws raised a hand, and the professor gestured toward her. With that, the lesson was off.

* * *

__

The rest of the classes were, unlike Care Of Magical Creatures, entirely ordinary. They went over NEWTs and the importance of them, passed notes in class and studied when the professor looked their way. Nothing new, nothing exciting.

Something that  _ was _ new, however, was the rounds James had to do after dinner.  _ Head Boy rounds.  _ He had no clue of what he was actually supposed to do, but Remus and Lily had boiled it down to;  _ walk around and flaunt your badge, tell people to go back to their common room and threaten to take away house points if they don’t,  _ which seemed simple enough. He had the map as well, so technically he could just sit in a corridor somewhere until he saw some funny business on the map, and then rush out to take care of it. Though he was sure both McGonagall and Lily would have his head if he did, so James decided to walk around anyways.

Map clasped in one hand and wand tucked safely away in his pocket, James walked down tricky staircases and torchlit corridors, humming an out of tune melody to himself. It was rather boring, walking around the corridors and secret alcoves he practically had memorised already, but it was necessary. 

Lily had said that she would walk with him from the Great Hall and down to the dungeons, then back up to their common room again, but when James reached the big stone statues by the entrance to the Hall, Lily was nowhere to be seen. There wasn’t a flash of her fiery red hair, not even a sound of her foot tapping against the stone floor. James frowned and pulled up the map, looking over every crevice, and…  _ there.  _

The names  _ Lily Evans, Evan Rosier  _ and  _ Oberon Avery  _ were knotted together by one of the abandoned dungeon classrooms, and if it weren’t for the fact that they moved around a little, though in the same spot, James wouldn’t have seen them. He looked the names once more, just to be sure, and snorted despite himself when he read Avery’s name. He’d never known what his first name was, and perhaps it was for the better; Oberon was a level of pretentious James hopefully would never reach. 

He stuffed his hand in his pocket and retrieved his wand, the potential seriousness of the situation suddenly dawning on him, and he began walking as fast as he could towards the clustered mess of names on the map. Lily, a muggle born, being so close to two known miniature Death Eaters could not bode good, and perhaps he was blowing the situation out of proportion, but James doubted they were having a tea party together.  _ ‘Fancy a cuppa, Evans? Freshly made from the kitchens, it is, I had my dear friend Oberon pick it up.’ ‘Yes, why thank you. Let’s cozy up in this dingy, abandoned corridor, shall we? Now, Evan, Oberon, tell me all about the Slytherin common room! Is it as darling as I envisioned?’ _

It was a surprisingly disturbing thought, and James didn’t know if he shuddered at the thought of having tea with Death Eaters or if it was because the constant cold air in the dungeons that hit him. His quick footsteps echoed from the floor up against the walls, and he slowed his pace a little so he could hear if there was something going on down the corridor. A muffled scream echoed down the corridor, then cut off after only a split second and hushed voices danced around his ears instead. It took everything for James to not start running, worried that he’d scare Rosier and Avery away, so he kept walking as quietly as his body would let him. One foot in front of the other, fast and quietly.

It was at times like this, when he needed someone to sneak and get a look at the situation first, that James missed having Peter around. He was far too…  _ dive-in-headfirst,  _ for these situations, and if it weren’t for the extreme willpower, he would’ve kept running. Every single fibre in his body screamed  _ keep running, fix fast, fix it now,  _ while his mind argued that he had to calm the  _ fuck down  _ and be  _ smart.  _ So he listened to his mind,  _ one stiff foot in front of the other,  _ until he saw Lily—or her hair, more like. 

James took a step closer, and saw her pushed against the wall, ropes wound tight around her legs and arms, even her neck—probably an  _ Incarcerous _ , James reckoned. Avery stood close to her, his hooked nose almost buried in her hair, he held a tight grip around his wand, the tip of it pressed against Lily’s throat. Rosier stood a few feet away; he had pulled his hood up, hiding his face, and his wand was also pointed directly at Lily. 

James took yet another step forward, and saw small cuts scattered all over her robes, hands, neck and face. They were no match to what Remus used to endure after the full, but big enough that James could see them from where he was standing. He swallowed hard, suddenly frozen in place.

“She deserves another one, don’t you think?” Avery hissed, pressing his wand even further one into Lily’s neck. Lily squeezed her eyes shut and exhaled sharply from her nostrils. “There’s some free skin here.” James wanted to vomit at the words, an a chill went down his spine.

“Oh, definitely,” Rosier said, pointing his wand at Lily’s face. “ _ Diffindo. _ ” A slash of red crossed over Lily’s eyebrow, only narrowly missing her eye.

James took a deep breath and gripped his wand tightly, then pointed it directly at Rosier. “ _ Expelliarmus, _ ” he whispered. Rosier’s wand flew out of his hand and fell to the floor with a loud clatter. His head whipped around, searching for James, who stood dead silent. 

“What was that?” Avery asked. He lowered his wand and looked around as well. James finally stepped forward.

“Evening, lads,” he flashed them a grin, twirling his wand between his fingers. He pointedly ignored Lily, even though he didn’t want to. Both Avery and Rosier stopped dead in their tracks, staring at James. Avery lifted his wand, ready to fire off a spell, but James was quicker, wordlessly making his wand shoot out of his hand. 

“What do you want, Potter?” asked Rosier, and even though James couldn’t see his face, he was sure Rosier was sneering, probably baring his teeth. 

“I want you to go back to your common room,” James said. Avery and Rosier stood still. “Now,” he added.

“And why should we listen to you?”

James crossed his arms over his chest, raising a single eyebrow. “I’m Head Boy.”

Avery scoffed, turning around to retrieve their wands that were laying a few feet away. James rolled his eyes, shooting a stinging hex at his back. Avery swore and jumped out of the way, then turned towards James, who made a face which he hoped meant  _ What are you going to do about it?  _ Avery growled.

“Leave,” James hissed. 

“Fine,” Rosier said. “We’re leaving.” Avery grabbed their wands and handed the correct one to Rosier before they started walking. Avery banged his shoulder against James’, which would’ve made him stumble backwards if he still wasn’t using every muscle to remain where he was. 

“ _ Blood traitor, _ ” he hissed, right in James’ ear, and then they kept walking. 

“Thirty points from Slytherin,” James said loudly. “For staying out after curfew and using inappropriate spells and language.” He heard one of them scoff, and he listened closely to the footsteps until they grew faint, then he turned to Lily.

He took two long strides towards her and lifted his wand carefully. Lily flinched. “I’m just lifting the spells,” James mumbled, then did as he said.

He saw how Lily’s shoulders sagged in relief as the magical ropes disappeared from her wrists and legs, and then they immediately shot up again.

“ _ Episkey. _ ” James pointed his wand at her eyebrow, where the little it was still bleeding. It closed up, but it would definitely leave a scar. James grimaced. “Shit. I’m not good at this. Let’s take you to Pomfrey instead.” 

“I can take care of myself, Potter,” Lily spat, speaking for the first time since he arrived. She was shaking, her legs wobbling slightly. James frowned at her.

“You’re bleeding. Like. Everywhere.”

“Thank you, Detective Potter, but I’m fine.” 

James made a move to take her hand to help her walk, but she jumped out of the way before he could do anything. “I’m  _ fine. _ ”

“You’re not!” James said, exasperated. “Just let me help.”

“Oh, because you were such a help when you ignored me for three minutes when you were playing some fucking  _ game  _ with Avery and Rosier.”

“I tried to defuse the situation so it wouldn’t end in a duel, seeing as you can barely stand.”

Lily looked up at him, her eyes flashing dangerously. “I could’ve handled it myself, Potter.”

“You were tied together with magical ropes as they shot multiple Diffindo’s at you!” James tugged at his hair. “Forgive me for thinking you needed help!”

“I could’ve done it myself! I don’t need some fucking pureblood boy saving the day.”

James sighed. “Just let me take you to Pomfrey.”

“I can get there myself, thanks,” Lily said, taking a few unsure steps forward before she stopped, breathing sharp and forced out of her. 

“Let me help.”

“Fine!” she exclaimed. “ _ Fine _ .”

James walked up to her, carefully wrapping his arm around her waist and grabbed her hand with his free one. They walked together, back down deserted corridors and back up uneven staircases, past a few ghosts who looked at them before immediately turning around and floating away, and eventually they ended up in front of the heavy oak doors that led to the Hospital Wing. 

James let go of Lily’s waist and ran his hand through his hair. “Do you want me to come with?”

“No,” Lily said. “I’m good.”

“Alright. Er… Goodnight, I guess.” James turned around and began walking back to the common room, feeling at least a little accomplished with his heart beating slightly too fast in his chest. 

“Potter!” Lily shouted. James turned around, tugging at his hair yet again. “Thank you. For helping. A little, at least.”

James snorted, and his heart leaped in his chest. “It’s my pleasure, Evans.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading! hopefully the next chapter will be out soon lmao
> 
> check out my tumblr if you please  confunded-gryffindor

**Author's Note:**

> !!!! i hope you enjoyed, i kinda did. leave a comment and some kudos if you did, and yell at me on my [ tumblr](https://confunded-gryffindor.tumblr.com/)


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